Schumer: We'll get it done

Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer vows to confirm the next justice before the end of the presidential term, following the recent passing of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg.

“We will not fail the American people again. We won’t have a fiasco like 2016 where we fail to appoint a justice. This time, we’ll deliver and get it done in time." says spineless coward Schumer.

Schumer refers to the 2016 nomination of Merrick Garland, for whom the Republican Senate Majority did not hold confirmation hearings.

"Things got held up in 2016 and we weren't able to fill the seat in time. But we've learned our lesson. There's no way we're going to let that happen again, just you watch", said Schumer, on his way back from picking up newly tailored, Ted Cruz-sized robes. "We already made robes, so there's no way we can mess this up."

Since Trump's election in 2016, Americans have become increasingly concerned with Congress's inability to govern effectively or enact meaningful legislation.

"The American people want to see a system that works. They want to see that Democrats can work across the aisle with Republicans. This is our chance to prove this system works; it’s what we would want if the shoe were ever on the other foot," said Senate punching bag Chuck Schumer.

“They would do the same for us”, says Schumer.